Wednesday, October 3, 2012

A Honest Admission...

“I don’t know if God even wants me to do this anymore.”

The tears rolled down my face as I cried pathetically on the couch. Mom sat nearby and Dad was seated in the rocking chair across the way, both listening to me unload the heavy weight which had been burdening my heart. I was confused. I was upset at myself. I felt pressured. I was discouraged.

The website I had begun at age 14 was in shambles and sadly neglected. I had been desiring to redesign it, to relaunch it with fresh vision, but there it sat for several years. Good friends would give gentle, yet persistent reminders, “Hey, how’s Godly Girlhood coming?” People would come up to our CD table and grab my business card, while I would sheepishly explain that it was still in the works. And every once in a while I’d visit the site and say, “Oh, I should do something!”

But the “something” I kept striving for wasn't really what it was meant to be. God’s plans have been different from mine.